Educating to help people stay safe & recover from sociopaths & psychopaths

Sociopaths Retaliate With a Vengeance When Exposed

Posted 2 years ago by Admin. Posted in: Psychopaths & Tagged as:

"What is the one thing a sociopath does not want other people to know? The truth. More specifically, sociopaths do not want the truth about them to be known as they are insecure, malicious, and devious people. Beyond being embarrassed by the truth of their behaviors and thoughts, they have a deathly fear of being exposed and rejected. That’s in large part because they use lies, manipulations, and distortions to control other people and get what they want. If others were to know about their true nature, they...would lose the support networks of malicious minions they control and incite to abuse other people. Therefore sociopaths have a strong motivation to attack, discredit, harass, and ruin anybody who presents arguments and facts that might tend to raise questions and doubts about their behaviors and their false statements."



Sociopaths Experts At Blaming Others, Greatly Fear Being Blamed

"They may realize that blaming is how they control others to harm the targets they viciously attack, often family members or former love interests."

"Sociopaths may be especially cognizant of the risk that people whom they have used to abuse others might even turn against them, especially those who might be greatly angered by how they were manipulated into participating in destructive and harmful activities against others. People like to blame others."

"Sociopathic abusers often engage in distortion campaigns to control and manipulate others to prejudice them into having false beliefs about the victim. By the time the victim of the campaign is aware of it, he or she may have been routinely trashed and lied about for several years to the point that anything he or she says or does will somehow be interpreted as evidence of them being the problem."

"Many of the sociopaths recruit others to help them, typically using lies, distortions, and other people’s own experiences to convince them that they should help ruin another person’s life. Bill Eddy calls them “negative advocates” in many of his writings. I’ve often called them the “minions” of the sociopath. Some of these minions later realize that they were used to harm innocent people and end up feeling very bad about their own actions."


"If you have been in a relationship with a psychopathic personality -
•    if you seek to expose them, bear in mind they are likely to respond with vitriolic rage, threats, vicious and hurtful communication, or attempts to discredit you and smear your reputation

•    don’t beat yourself up about not recognising the signs earlier; just act as soon as you do
•    seek therapy as soon as possible; the trauma of these encounters can be long-lasting and profound
•    if possible, warn others of your experience
•    bear in mind he will be doing his best to cast you as irrational or downright crazy"

"After the victim ends a relationship with a psychopath, this behavior is likely to escalate into downright stalking. This happens for the reasons I have explained in previous articles:

-- psychopaths, being control-driven, want to WIN. To them, winning means catching their targets into their spider’s nets and destroying them

-- psychopaths, being control-driven, want to exact vengeance and intimidate those who no longer worship them, want them, or obey them blindly."


  1. Lenka says:

    I just recently got out of a relationship with a pure sociopath. I happen to know several women that are stil in his life and he is involved with. After recognizing who he truly is a sociopath, I want to warn these women and in essence expose him but I hold back because I am afraid of what or how he may react once I do this. What would you suggest? Do I expose and give these women a heads up and spare them the awful and truly unbearable experience that I went through with this man or do I just let him be?

    • Elaine Doxie says:

      You can try to warn them, but until they see it for themselves, it may not do much good. I know that I tried to warn my ex’s new wife when I have seen behavior that is heading down that road to abuse, but she has not only ignored me, but believes that it is only the rantings of a “bitter ex-wife.” This is when she has been abused herself and I have pointed it out to her. Other than that, I don’t know what I can do. I was never prepared to be battling a person with no conscience who cares only about winning, and it doesn’t matter to him what happens to anyone else. To this day, he has my kids, and I wish I could get them back, but it’s a long road to teach them that I love them again. Fortunately, as 3 out of four are adults now, I have the freedom to do so.

  2. Admin says:

    Is there is some way that you could reveal the facts you know to help spare other women from going through what you went through – without putting yourself in harm’s way? That is such a complicated place to be in, my heart goes out to you.

  3. Tim Basquin says:

    I am a magnet to sociopaths, Now that I know the correct label for them, I used to call them selfish greedy people, and couldn’t believe what they would do to get their way. To the point of wondering if I ways seeing it actually take place. With persuasion from them I therefore questioned my insanity. I am a 47 y.o. male with a true to the bone sociopath older brother and a 3 year older brother that was his puppet. My whole life I was tortured by these 2 in every aspect of any situation possible.

    I try to think of one incident but my mind floods of a thousand recaps of incident after incident. Such Deviant Deviant people. Even after completely being done with him I let him sweet talk his way one more time into my life and when he thought he stabbed me one more time he departed only he was wrong he wronged the lawyer that I had hired and when I had warned the lawyer of his personality he agreed to bill us siblings separately there for he didn’t sting me and was soon summonsed back to Iowa from California to face a Judge in my lawyers county. he was smart enough to just pay his inflated bill and of course he took his puppet down with him. I have heard that his puppet my middle brother and him have since broke ties and do not speak either.

    I hope to hear when my oldest brother passes on so I can throw the biggest happiest party known to me. I’m talking a concert by my favorite band at the time and nothing but sure delight in being able to put what he has done to me my whole life to rest. The concert part is only wishful thinking and as far as my middle brother It will be sad to see him go for he was a victim just like me but he has never apologized for taking part in the many times that he assisted in setting me up. For that reason I do not go out of my way to talk to him. That is 40 years of abuse by an older sibling that I was always taught and told that I needed to look up to and that he wouldn’t do that “For Christ’s Sake He’s Your Brother.”

    I was finally able to expose him and he has not allowed my most favorites niece speak to me since. That Bastard! He should of been drowned at birth! When you have been made out to be the bad person your whole life, you yearn to be the good guy just once and so that eagerness attracts sociopath females like you wouldn’t believe, so it was years of still being made out to be the bad guy with all the evidence that social path gathers thru out the run of a relationship until they have used you up or gotten so lazy about hiding things that they actually boast and get careless and you finally see that they are the devil.

    It’s too late your spun and they have all their evidence neatly stacked with a program to go with their version of the play they just directed and played the leading role in as the ” Victim.” You get a little weak and you don’t stand as tall as you once did after each one of those relationships. In metamorphic terms I would say you are chopped down about 6″ each time I started out at 6′ 0″ and by the time I realized what was happening with my choice of women I now stand about 3′ 6″. Its a very educated 3″6″ but not a very trusting short soul either.

    My problem is that I can mimic a social path to a tee and love to play with them and even though I know them so well and what they are about I still get attached. It’s the sex part, since puberty all of my lovers have pretty much been sociopaths, therefore I have developed a crave and can perform sex very well and have turned the way a normal person would think about sex and do just the opposite. Sociopath women are awesome lovers! my relationships are becoming not as long in lasting as they used to be and when they figure out that they were the ones actually getting played and not me, suddenly I am used up.

    This last one thought I was actually so dumb when obviously I’m not but rather she had a good run of easy victims and I have exposed her to the point that now I know what is going to happen. First of all in her rush to get out of here after I exposed her, She will either kill me or herself and has started to proceed with my thoughts, by taking up a mate she knows nothing about and moving from Iowa to the high desert in California that obviously by his court record likes to beat on women. It won’t be long and he will kill this gal out of sheer frustration of her lying and manipulating ways and is so quick or possible because she is also an alcoholics and drug addict that she forgets and is constantly mixing stories p.

    She did not want to see the court records on this guy, that I had researched not because I didn’t want her to go. but because she didn’t care she had to leave here she had been exposed, by me. The desperation to get that final jab in on me for exposing him is so comical to watch and hear. Her push to try to get close to me is a class act that I’ve seen played so many times that I can’t believe she would even think of trying it.
    I hope this may help a normal person understand the chararistics of a female sociopath. Tim Basquin

  4. Paula Jacobs says:

    I think you have associated with sociopaths so long – you know are one. Birds of a feather, so true. You use humor for your reasons to continue relationships with them? Its because you’re so familiar with the dynamics and the problems its a safe zone for you. A normal person would NOT be playing the games you are my friend. You have become sociopathic purely voluntarily for whatever reasons, or you might have always been one… some of the sickest people dont think THEY are……… got a problem though

  5. blackout says:

    I have began to suspect that my son is a sociopath. It is an absolutely devastating realization to make. He exhibited delinquent behaviors when he was younger, such as break and enters, shoplifting, property damage, small time drug dealing, expulsion from school–I hoped he would outgrow these. He refused to participate in therapy because he would never acknowledge that there may be a problem. His behaviors became so damaging in our home that he I had to have him leave. He would come up with the most devious and malicious stories to discredit us as parents to neighbors, family, friends and anybody he felt he could use to humiliate us, including social services who came to the conclusion that his accusations were false. Once he realized that he was no longer able to able to manipulate me and that I was not going to let him back into our home, he has been on a unrelenting campaign to harass and humiliate me, almost exactly as this article describes. He seems to have been successful with some, not all though. THIS IS MY OWN SON, who I have loved and cared for, and it is heartbreaking. I am changing addresses, and considering changing my phone number, although this a difficult step to take. He is only 18 years old, and I know this is young, but as I said he has refused all offers of help, claiming that everyone else is responsible and he is fine. He scored 31 out of 40 on Robert Hare’s test for psychopathy. Granted, this was not a professional evaluation, but the online version–but I feel instinctively that he is not right. My father recently described him as “not seeming to know right from wrong” I think on some level he can distinguish the difference, it’s just irrelevant for him, it does not bother him. The lying behaviors started to become very obvious after the death of his father at the age of 8 and a half, and then other destructive more behaviors followed that, although even before his father died, he was always very, very challenging and often deceitful. He was my first child and I had nothing to compare it to, my younger son exhibits none of these behaviors.

    I wish there was something more I could do than just avoid him, but from all that I have read and what my therapist has explained to me, if this is what he is there is no cure, it is how his brain is wired. A very painful reality to face when it comes to someone you love. I hope beyond hope that this is something else, perhaps related to his losses, but even those losses, he uses to his advantage. There is a feeling of utter helplessness.

  6. Jackie says:

    they wont believe you anyway….they will just think of you as the jealous ex girlfriend. Let them find out the same way you did. And they will… me.

    • Susan says:

      I agree with Jackie. I found out the hard way despite warnings I received. The woman after me even lied in court to support my ex against me as a result of his lies. She also found out the hard way a few months down the road. I think in the beginning everyone is so intoxicated by the love bombing that they can not believe that such a loving, fun, exciting. soul mate could ever be such an awful person. Even if you feel some red flags in your gut, you dismiss them and think, “It’s different with us. She did not love him like I do. She was not cognizant of his needs. He and I are soul mates and we will be like this forever.” Everyone finds out the hard way I think. The stories he tells makes it look like any warning you try to give is just coming from a disgruntled ex-lover.

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